Sunday, April 4, 2010

Where I Am

Day 86
I am not ashamed to say that there are still times that I wonder who I'd be if I had made different decisions after high school. I had the opportunity to go to a music school in New York City-even got a scholarship (puny as it may have been). I would have arrived at my dorm in Manhattan in late August of 2001 right before the attacks on the World Trade Center. I had been rocking back and forth for several weeks on whether or not I was going to make that leap. It wasn't until my mom called me at work to let me know that the school had contacted her and needed a response that I finally knew. It was one of those pivotal moments where my life could have gone so differently. It just wasn't my path. I can't tell you how much I upset my teachers at the conservatory, dance studio, and friends that had been so encouraging-but I knew it wasn't right. I decided to get my degree in Communication from a state college, live in England, get married, and now I am the mother of two beautiful children. I know there are some people from that time in my life that view me as a sell out. And there are still days, especially since the invention of Facebook, that I am confronted with friends that did choose that path and have been very successful- and it makes me wonder who I'd be. But then I have days like today- where I can step back and realize I am exactly where I should be. What could possibly be better than genuinely loving and being loved by your best friend and having brought two, gorgeous, extensions of you into the world? I realized today that I didn't give anything up- I gained everything!
And don't worry...I'll still be on that stage somewhere, someday.
Janet


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